Javanese wedding ceremony

The bridegroom and the bride take a bath with the holy water, called banyu suci Perwitosari.

Banyu is water, suci is holy, and perwitosari is essence of life. JP/ Tuladha Tanggap Wacana Basa Jawi.

Siraman, in the wedding ceremony is meant to clean the couple’s bodies as well as their souls. The first person who takes a  bath him or her is the father, then the mother and it is continued by others in list, like the grandparents, the uncle or the aunt.

After Siraman, the rituals continue with Midodareni. Midodareni,  derived from the word “widodari”, means goddess.

In the evening the bride becomes beautiful like a goddess. The bride usually wear kebaya, the Javanese traditional clothes. Then, her hair bun and her face will be made-up angel. She should be visited by goddesses from heaven. The bride has to stay in the room until midnight accompanied by some elder women giving her useful advice.

The advice that usually gives are about how to be a good wife and how to manage their marriage life.

That is the beginning of the Javanese wedding ceremony. Then, the ceremony will be continued by Ijab to legalize their marriage. But, the ijab depends on their religion.

After an Ijab’s ritual, the ceremony continues with other rituals.  Usually the ritual is lead by the pranatacara (like event organize or MC).

Andreas Suwardi as the pranatacara in the wedding ceremony said that the first ritual in the day of wedding is Wiji dadi. The bridegroom crashes a chicken egg with his right foot, then the bride washes the bridegroom’s foot several times using water mixed several flowers.

“It  means the bridegroom is ready to become a responsible father and should be a faithful husband.” Said Andreas Suwardi.

Then, the father leads the couple to the wedding chair. The mother covers the bridegroom and the bride with red fabric or Sindur. That’s symbolizing that the father shows the way of happiness, and the mother gives moral support. JP/Tuladha Tanggap Wacana Basa Jawi.

The bride and the bridegroom sit on the father’s lap. And the father will say that they have equal weight. That ritual called timbangan.

The father said that the bride and the bridegroom have equal weight; it means that the parents will love them both equally.  The parents will love the bride and the bridegroom as their son or daughter.

The bride and the bridegroom sat by the father on their wedding ceremony. That ceremony called Tanem, meant that the father approved of their marriage. The father also blesses them.

In the wedding ceremony, usually the couple exchanges their rings. And this ritual called Tukar Kalpika. They exchange their rings as a symbol of their love for each other. JP/Tuladha Tanggap Wacana Basa Jawi.


The couple walk arm in arm or more precisely holding each other with their little finger to site Kacar-kucur.

Kacar-kucur : The bridegroom gives to the bride some soybeans, peanuts, rice, corns, yellow rice, dlingo bengle herbs, flowers and coins of different values. The quantity of coins must be even. The coins must be in balance output. The bride carefully receives these gifts in a small white cloth, above an old mat which is put on her lap. JP/Tuladha Tanggap Wacana Basa Jawi.

“Kacar-kucur means, the husband should give all his income to his wife, and the wife should be a good careful house wife to manage the money.” Said Andreas Suwardi.

When the couples live together usually the husband who work to fulfill their family’s economy. And then, the husband gives his income to his wife and his wife should manage the income from her husband for their daily life carefully.

The ritual continues with Dulangan or Dahar Klimah. The couple eats together and feeds each other. They eats and feeds together means that they should use and enjoy their belongings together in their life.

Sungkeman is the touched moment for the bridegroom and the bride, also for their family. In this moment the couple is ready to build their new family so they will ask permission and blessing from their parents to build their own strong family.” Andreas Suwardi explained.

The couple should kneel and ask the blessing from their parents. The parents then escort the newlyweds.

The bridegroom and the bride are ready to walk in to their real life to build a strong family together.

After the wedding rituals are completed, then follows the reception. Usually, the bridegroom and the bride and also the guests will be entertained with love dancing.

Love dancing is dancing that shows the true love of men and women.  The favorite love dance is GATOTKACA-PERGIWO a fragment from the wayang story. This dance is favorite because Gatotkaca was a figure in Mahabarata epic or figure in the wayang. And this dance shows the Gatotkaca’s love story with Dewi Pergiwa the beautiful princes. JP/Tuladha Tanggap Wacana Basa Jawi.

Sometimes, while all the guests are enjoying the party by eating food that is offered, the sound of gamelan music echoes beautifully through the reception hall.


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